Just Go

Let’s pack our bags and go. Just go. Forget this world. Because I can feel myself unraveling, I can feel the crazy about to come out, I’m holding it in the best I can but any minute now I’ll break, so let’s go before all hell breaks loose, let’s skip this town while we still can.

I once dated a soccer player whose teammate told me the first time we met that he could just tell I was very sane and he liked that a lot. Of course he thought I was sane, who lets the crazy out the first time they meet someone? Noobs. No, I’ve got this figured out, I’ve got the crazy under control. What, did you hear that? Hear who? Hear that!

Let’s go now. I’ll pack for the both of us. I’ve got too many ties here, there’s too much at stake. I have to watch my every move, never knowing what I’m saying or doing that is tipping the balance of my environment. I can’t take it anymore. If we stay any longer I’ll crack and you won’t like what you see. No, you won’t like the crazy. 

I’ll mislead you, intentionally. I’ll know I’m doing it but I won’t be able to stop myself. I’ll be indecisive, you’ll be subjected to the whims of every minute inclination I have. I will hurt you, unintentionally. I don’t know how it happens but it does, inevitably. Don’t laugh, you don’t know what it’ll do to us, to you. I’ve seen the reruns and it always ends the same way. When the crazy becomes too much for me, I’ll lean on you. I’ll use you until the crazy has drained you too. 

No, just go. It’s too late for the both of us. I’ll stay and hold down the fort, you go. Leave now or you’ll be stuck here like me. I’ve resigned to my fate, there is still hope for you. 

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